Board Thread:Citizenship Applications/@comment-4768533-20141208141113/@comment-3560733-20141208142527

Ok, so, there are a few issues. First of all, she cannot Lavabend. All characters start with basic bending powers and must progress to further powers over time. This keeps things fair and balanced.

Next, I feel like you should explain he childhood better. You mention that her father wanted her to be a firebender and not another earthbender but you didn't really elaborate where you could have on her early childhood, her siblings, her parents, etc.

I also feel like you need a better reason for her to be kicked out. Even if she wasn't the right kind of bender her father wanted, I can't imagine that would be the only reason he kicked her out. After that, the entire part about the Capital is bit off to me. A lot more information here would be nice. Why and how did she join the probending league there, how did she meet Jaya, what was their friendship like, how long was she there, and more about his execution; all of these would be great things to expand upon.

Lastly, the whole "scientific breakthrough" part is a bit much. You say she's 15. With her being this young, this doesn't really make sense and even if she did make these breakthroughs, you need to explain what they are; and at that point you pose a problem as you cannot just say she came up with whatever you may think of; I'd suggest removing this part entirely, personally.

If you fixed and elaborated these things I think you'd have a great history here and would be happy to approve it.