Board Thread:Citizenship Applications/@comment-27989107-20170627134836/@comment-25931724-20170701060033

Ok this is a solid first attempt though it is a little short, generally the history should have the same number of paragraphs that you have, however each paragraph should be about twice as long. The personality should be at least about twice as long as well.

Simply put you need to put a little more detail into the personality and history. Your application format is good so that is not an issue. However your grammar and sentence structure are more of an issue. For example you have " In her 5, She fall down from a cliff in Northern Air Temple. She was climbing up to a high tree on a cliff. It is the closest place near the sky. She jump off from the cliff and miraclely, she meet a kind spirit and save her. The price she has to pay is her leg. She give up her leg just so she can live again. "   This paragraph would both work better and make more sense like this. ''"In her 5th year, She fell down a cliff in the Northern Air Temple. She was climbing a large tree by the cliffside as it was the closest place in the temple to the sky. When she fell she was met by a kind spirit, who miraculously saved her life. She however, lost her leg in the process as a price for this miracle." ''

If you have any questions or need any help in the future please feel free to message a staff member, we would be more than happy to help you out

-Gig